Thursday March 19th is "Let's Laugh Day"

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Dale

Super Moderator
Staff member
#1
There is not enough laughter in the world today. Thursday March 19th is "Let's Laugh Day". So let's all post a clean joke, so we can all have a chuckle this week. Laughter is good for the soul!!!
 

Kya D

Active Member
#2
March 19th "let's laugh day" Dale this is the best one yet.
'Oh, doctor', he said, 'my wife thinks she's a chicken'. The doctor gasped, 'That's terrible. How long has she been like that?'

The husband replied, 'Three years'. The doctor was horrified, 'Three years! Why didn't you bring her to me sooner?'

The husband said sheepishly, 'Because we needed the eggs.'
 

Dale

Super Moderator
Staff member
#3
Here's my laugh for the week....Picking Lemons

A woman went to a Florida lemon grove to apply for a job. The foreman thought she seemed too qualified for the position. "Do you have any actual experience picking lemons", the foreman asked.

"Think I do, I picked 3 ex-husbands."
 

Dale

Super Moderator
Staff member
#8
The Smith's were a prominient family, their family came accross in the Mayflower. They hired and author to compile their family history there were senators in their family but also Great Uncle John who had been exectued in the electric chair.

The author said not to worry he would handle the story tactfully. The book was printed. It stated, "Great Uncle John occupied a chair of applied electronics at an important institution and was attached to his position by the strongest of ties. His death came as a great shock."

Just goes to show things aren't always what they seem!!! Hehehehe
 

Kya D

Active Member
#9
was walking home last night when I noticed an old drunk staggering along the road. He passed a woman who was walking a young child. "Lady", said the drunk, "that's the ugliest kid I've ever seen. Dang, that is one ugly child!." As the drunk wandered off, the lady burst into tears. Just then, a mailman came to her rescue. "What's the matter, madam?" he asked. "I've just been horribly insulted" she sobbed. "There there," said the mailman, reaching into his pocket. "Dry your eyes with this tissue, and here's a banana for the chimp"
 

Kya D

Active Member
#11
You are driving in a car at a constant speed.
On your left side is a valley and on your right side is a fire engine traveling at the same speed as you.
In front of you is a galloping pig which is the same size as your car and you cannot overtake it.
Behind you is a helicopter flying at ground level.
Both the giant pig and the helicopter are also traveling at the same speed as you.
What must you do to safely get out of this highly dangerous situation?

Scroll down for the answer.

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** Answer: GET OFF THE CHILDREN'S CAROUSEL !
 

Randy

Super Moderator
Staff member
#12
What does a Chinese chicken say?

"Wok wok wok, wok wok wok." (hehehehehe pure corn!!!!)
There was a little girl at the bank today and I told her she should come by our house and see the chickens. I told her they talked to me. But what you see above is about the limit of their vocabulary. BTW, the little girl's mother used to live just across the road from us.
 

Dale

Super Moderator
Staff member
#16
Dawn that one was PURE CORN!!!! Keep them coming, I need all the laughs I can get. My husband and I are working on our taxes.
 
#19
HEHE, you guys are silly! We haven't started taxes yet, but I think that I need to get a tax lawyer, as I didn't file in the US during my 7 years in Canada, and now I am told that I should have. Yikes. Taxes in Canada are so much higher than they are in the US that I shouldn't have to pay anything here, but all I can claim is ignorance, and that isn't much of a help. Hubby is going to kick himself for marrying me. Life goes on.
 

Randy

Super Moderator
Staff member
#20
"If I melt dry ice, can I take a bath without getting wet?"
Now, Miss Kya, that is terribly funny, but I can't help but allow my technical background to surface here. Dry ice does not melt. It is one of the few substances that goes through a process called sublimation. Sublimation is the process of going from a solid state to a vapor state without going through the liquid state.
 


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